Friday, November 04, 2005

Lighter?

I promised a lighter post for today. That brings to mind weight loss. Which, of course, makes one lighter!

Which in turn reminds me of a story. A true one. It happened to me.

Last week I went to the drive through window at a local burger joint. I ordered two burgers — NOT the meals, just the sandwiches. That’s it. No drinks, no fries, no desserts. I pulled forward to the pick-up window, paid, and waited.

This particular chain doesn’t make the burgers until you order (“We Make It Just For You!”) so it took a while.

Eventually the burger-person slid open the little window and handed me TWO bags. Usually when I order two burgers (and btw, they weren’t both for me — it’s important that you know that!) they put them both in one bag.

Now these bags felt a bit bulky and heavier than I’d expected, so I glanced inside one and saw fries.

I immediately held the bags back to the burger-person and said, “These aren’t mine. I didn’t have fries.”

He said, “Oh, I know. I just put them in there for the weight.”

Say what? I hefted the bag, and said, “You needed to make them heavier?”

He looked at me with an uncomprehending expression (come to think of it, it was the same expression he always had), and said, “No, man, for the weight.”

As if speaking louder would help me understand.

I glanced down at my waist, wondering if I looked obese to him. Or maybe, I thought, he thinks I need to GAIN some weight?

Seeing me continue to hesitate, he explained, “I didn’t charge you for them.”

Oh. Well THAT certainly cleared things up. He wanted the bags to be heavier, but not cost more. Uh huh.

What the HELL was he talking about?!

I shrugged, put the car in gear, and started to raise the window. He tried one more time.

“It’s because you had to WAIT so long.”

With a bright red face and feeling like a TOTAL idiot, I pretended I didn’t hear him and drove away.

And I thought HE was uncomprehending! He probably thought, as I drove off, “That’s the last time I’ll try to be nice to a customer.”

So the next time a drive-through person is rude or indifferent to you, blame me. It’s probably the guy who threw in some free fries to my order because he thought I’d waited a long time.

(Actually I drove around to the door, parked, and went inside to tell the manager how nice the drive-through person had been. Probably got him fired for giving a customer free food!)

(And, FYI, I’m 6’1” tall with a 36” waist. Not that it’s any of your business.)

11 comments:

Onyx said...

LOL. I never getthis kind of service!! As a matter of fact the last two times I went to that establishment they were out of the items I wanted! 1st no salad, and 2nd no chicken. WTH?! I've actually gone to KFC and had them tell me they were out of chicken. Never received anything for the wait.

Michelle said...

That was definitely funny and lighthearted. Thanks for the chuckle and have a super duper weekend.

Onyx said...

Actually I found it by browsing the blogs (using the Next Blog button in the upper right hand corner.)

Thanks for stopping by!!!!

Christina said...

HILARIOUS!!!

kenju said...

I visit a Bojangle's drive-thru nearly everyday, and the only time they give me free fries (accidentally) is when I have made a firm resolve to quit eating fries!! Isn't that some sort of instant karma?

shyloh said...

Thank you for telling me about the software.. IT WORKED WOOHOO.

Hale McKay said...

I'm surprised you waist the guy for making fun of your waste. I have weighted a long time for such a waity topic to be posted.

Karyn Lyndon said...

We stopped by a different McDonalds tonight and discovered they serve chicken fried steak and mashed potatos. When did I miss that memo? Not only that but the entire McDonalds is paneled in rich mahogany and has ornate chandeliers. We gave our order to an actual PERSON at the drive thru window and pulled into a numbered parking space to WAIT for the food. Have we fallen into an alternate universe?

Duke_of_Earle said...

Karyn,

I thought you said you didn't drink?? Are you SURE that was a Mickey D's?

Actually, in Chicago on my vactaion trip, my daughter took us to a place that is owned by McDonalds called simply "Chipotle." They serve outstanding burritos to order. Go figure. Maybe McDonalds' Board of Directors has decided to expand their markets!

John

Jennifer said...

*snort*

If he had given me the fries for the "weight", as in he thought I needed to add a few pounds, I would have been so flattered. :-)

Mickey is getting ready to sell off Chipotle, which is an unbelievably stupid idea on their part if you ask me. I am addicted to the place. The good news is, there isn't one where I live. The bad news? There are three "knock offs".

*sigh*

Duke_of_Earle said...

Christina,

You would think it was hilarious. You have a collge degree in "Speech Communications." and clearly there wasn't much of that happening.

Jennifer,

I just learned that Chipotle existed, and now you're telling me McDonalds is selling the "chain?" I'd be addicted to it also if one existed in Victoria, TX. But that'll never happen, since we're not what you'd call a "major market." HA!

John