Not AGAIN!?!

Our house is 38 years old, and we’ve lived in it for 24. Last October we replaced the two original wooden overhead garage doors with sparkling new steel-and-foam-sandwich insulated doors (can you say, “Energy Tax Credit?”).

I mean, we replaced everything; doors, electric openers, guide rails, rollers, remotes. . . THE WORKS!

And they are NICE! Whisper-quiet opening system (belt drive), and good, strong solid doors that almost glide up and down the rails. Expensive, yes; but I expected them to last as long as I own the house.

Did you catch the use of the past tense in that last sentence? Not a typo.

A few mornings ago while I was at work, Carol pushed the “open” button on the wall, and “her” door went up. Er . . . It started to go up! After about two feet of travel she heard a noise and the door stopped. She didn’t see anything wrong, so pushed the button again thinking that the door would reverse and go back down. But no, it started UP again(??). Accompanied by a cacophony of pops, cracks and groans, the door struggled to the top of its travel and stopped, but two of the four panels had buckled and sagged in the middle over her car.

She called me at work. I advised her to get her car out (quickly!), but not to touch the button, or her remote. I then called the company that had installed the doors and described what Carol told me. They sent a repair technician immediately.

He examined everything and left, scratching his head. He told us we’d hear from his boss.

The boss called later. “Can’t possibly be a defect in the doors or opening system. Never seen anything like it in 25 years in the business, but definitely not a warranty case. I’ll sell you a new door for $625.”

I asked, “So what damaged the door!? It was fine the day before. It lowered just fine the night before it failed.”

Answer: “Had to be something hit it from the outside when it was down, damaging the panels.”

Oka-a-a-ay.

I called the police to report apparent vandalism. (Not that the police could DO anything about it, but in case there were other reports of this kind of vandalism in our neighborhood, they needed to know.) An officer came and looked over the situation. His assessment: “No marks or scratches on the outside of the door. No broken glass or other indications. You heard no noises during the night, right? Nope, no other reports of problems around here. Definitely not vandalism. Probably the door jammed going up and buckled.”

Gee, if it wasn’t the door . . . and it wasn’t damage from somebody, then . . . ??

I KNOW!! IT HAD TO BE THE . . . oops (shhh) ycaripsnoc!!

Anyway, you know what THAT means! Plumbing will start leaking, electrical appliances will start failing, your home may develop strange cracks in the walls, and your car will start making noises and having mechanical problems.

Likely your computer will freeze, your hard drive will fry, and your modem will stop modem-ing.

Be warned! Be alert! And be afraid!