Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Hey! It's in the Bible!

I’ve mentioned in this blog in the past that Carol and I read the Bible all the way through each year.

Why? Well, it started out as a spiritual thing; an attempt to really get to know what the Word of God says all the way through. It’s not through some compulsion or weird cult “rule” or anything. We started in the mid 1970s, so we’re probably on our 30-somethingth time through it. Yes, it’s become a habit.

I don’t tell you this to make any claims about whether the practice is good or bad. To me, one of the good aspects is that I understand the history of the land of Palestine and surrounding areas during biblical times. I know how the kingdom of Israel split in two after the reign of King Solomon, and what happened between then and the time of Christ.

I’ve never gone in for memorization, like a lot of Bible students, so I can’t quote you chapter and verse. But I know pretty much what’s in each of the Bible’s books and how it’s all laid out and presented. That knowledge has helped me pick out many obscure references in film and literature that most people don’t get.

Example: Did you see the movie “Contact” with Jodie Foster and Matthew McConaughey? That’s the one about the search for extra-terrestrial intelligence, in which she travels through a worm hole and makes contact with an alien, but nobody believes her. Anyway, remember the machine that was built for the space travel? One was built by the government, but do you remember who built the other one?

S. R. Haddon, the reclusive billionaire.

So what? Well, in the Bible, one of the kings of Assyria, mentioned only twice, was...

Essarhaddon! (2 Kings 19:37), son of Sennacherib. I’ll bet you didn’t get that reference, did you?

Okay, all of that to say this: Some have actually scoffed in the past at my contention that there is a force at work among us which I refer to as the “C.” It attacks inanimate objects such as appliances, electronic equipment, plumbing fixtures, homes and vehicles. It communicates through pipes and wires and even the airwaves, spreading misery to all mankind.

Well, to those scoffers I say — read Jeremiah 11:14. “And the LORD said unto me, A conspiracy is found among the men of Judah, and among the inhabitants of Jerusalem.”

There you have it. Right from the Bible. And it’s been around for nearly 3,000 years.

Scoff NOW!


Candace said...

Relax. You're not an inhabitant of Jerusalem, are you?

Karyn Lyndon said...

Oh that's right! I forgot about the refrigerator plaque on Jerusalem when they had to throw out all their first-born racks of lamb...or something like that.

Anonymous said...

Contact is my favourite movie of all time. I really empathised with Jodie Fosters character with regards to her trying to convince people that she'd seen something. Plus - the opportunity to bonk Matthew MacConaughey would be great too! [naughty giggle].

robotjam said...


Its a bit eeriely (how many e's in that word ?) quiet on the "C" front at the moment. HAve we had any reported incidents in the last 2 months. I think not.

I'm watching out as I suspect a full on attack next time I have a deadline to meet.

Duke_of_Earle said...

No, no, you're missing the point! Well, some of you are. Not RobotJAM, but he's especially tuned into the "C" (and may actually be involved in it).

The point is that the "C" has been around for 3000 years. The Bible doesn't say that it would STAY in Jerusalem, or even that it STARTED there. Back then it probably affected donkey carts and oar locks on fishing boats in the Sea of Galilee. But NOW look at all the things it can ruin!


Emmy Ellis said...

LOL @ scoff now!

I confess to starting to read the bible but I noted a couple of contradictions so put it down. Can't recall them now.


kenju said...

I would NEVER scoff, John, I don't know the Bible as well as you!